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‘I feel like a community is kind of like the root of kind of all relationships’
*Layla, 36, decided at the beginning of the year she wanted to make an effort to focus her energy on Muslim dating apps like Saalam (formerly known as Minder) and MuzMatch, oppose to conventional dating apps.
Layla identifies as bisexual and pansexual – so she wanted to make it clear in her profile – to ensure there weren’t any surprises coming her way when she went on dates.
But after those experiences, Layla took a break from the Muslim dating apps and logged onto Tinder. She remembers one day being ‘super liked’ by this Muslim man who she thought was cute and handsome.
The two hit it off immediately, and in no time went on a date. Their first date was very wholesome and “halal” as Layla puts it. But a week after their first meeting, he messaged late in the evening if he could come by, Layla said yes.
The episode left her feeling as though Muslim men could say anything to her because of the how she looks, from her piercings to how she presents with her sexuality
When she greeted him in the doorway she noticed he seemed different to their first date. He told her after she let him in that he had done cocaine on his way there.
She says men on these apps have told her that they couldn’t date her “for https://www.datingranking.net/nl/cupid-overzicht/ real” because of her sexuality, some have sent overtly sexual messages about their penis while others have made judgements about her piercings and not wearing the hijab
Layla says she was still thinking about their first date, and wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt. As the night went on, the two of them got a bit drunk and ended up having sex.
“I don’t think they would do that to a woman they meant through their network. Because he met me on Tinder, because of how I look he just made all these assumptions.”
Despite some of her experiences, Layla’s determination to be clear about her sexuality on Muslim dating apps is a development Dr Hussein says has been happening over the last few years.